First of all, my most sincerest apologies to all of you for my absence from this journal. Sadly I had to devote all of my creative energies to uni assignments. I will try my very hardest to keep updating so I can feed the ever-growing demand. But on to my latest story for today, well the last time I wrote on this blog I told the story of the Swindler, this teddy bear like man that brings in soggy cold pizzas and profiteers off his duped clientele. Well after a month long absence (possibly due to hibernation) he came back last night.
If I can recollect...
Well Wednesday night was a good night, it was coming to an end. About 15 minutes before the end of my shift, our friend the Swindler returns. The following is how things went from when he came in...
Scene 1: Work
Characters:
Altug as Altug,
Lockie as Lockie and
Teddy Bear Man as the Swindler in
"The Night the Pizza was no Biddy"
Enter Altug
Altug (to self): Another great night, but gee I am very hungry...
Enter Swindler
Swindler: HOOOOOW RRRRRRRRRRRRRRR YA mate!
Altug (with arms swinging): Oh NO!!!!!! You've returned A-GEIN!!!! I bought a pizza from you on Monday remember!!! ??
Swindler: I'VE GOT SOME BEUTI-FUL PETZAS FOR YA AND LOCKIE
Altug: Well I doubt that we shall want pizza tonight Pizza man, but we shall wait and see, Lockie comes in 15 minutes.
So there was a 15 minute period where two forces were waiting for the arrival of Lockie, the one that will decide upon the fate of the Pizza man's proposal.
Altug: So "Pizza Man" how goes the night?
Swindler: It wos good.....just delivering Petza
The Swindler walks to the magazine section and reads the ever so adulterous and teeny Zoo Magazine
Altug: So Swindler, what are you reading...?
Swindler: .... ....(ignoring all communication)
Altug: Well?
Swindler: .... .... .... ... Good..
Enter Lockie, co-worker
Altug (arms wide open): LOCKIE!!!!!!! YOU'RRRRRRRRRRREE BAAAAAACK! How art thou tonight!? Guess who is back tonight!!? Our good friend the Pizza man!
Lockie: I see
The Swindler goes to his car and brings in 2 cold arse pizzas
Swindler: Lockie! I got a fresh made, nice, nutrious Petzas! I made it just for you, just for you...only $10 each! $10!
Lockie: Ummmm.............errrrr.............Not this time buddy, one is too much for a week.. it isn't healthy
Altug: Hear hear Lockie, Pizza man, we cannot have 2 pizzas in a week! It would be impossible to burn it all off!
Swindler: NAH! Its good for you, it has vitamins! Look at me, I'm healthy...eh eh eh(him laughing pointing at his conspicuous yet cute beer belly)
Altug: uhhhhhh........no...no pizza for me pizza man
Swindler: C'MON LOCKIE! I made it for you! TAKE IT! $15 FOR BOTH!
Lockie: Um....I don't know....
Swindler: TAKE IT!
Lockie: Well no I shouldn't....
Swindler: TAKE IT! TAKE IT!
Altug: Pizza Man we cannot, its too much you little cutie pie
Swindler: C'MON LOCKIE TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE IT
Lockie: Look when I buy it, its cold and it just goes to the bin..
Altug: Pizza man, he's right, it would be a waste to throw it into the bin
Swindler: TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT!! $5 $5 $5! TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT!!!!
Lockie: ah.....no, no more pizza, one is enough a week..
Swindler: C'Mon Lockie! I made it just for you!! Besides I had a pizza tongiht, I can't finish these! TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT
Altug: TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT....uh...actually, Pizza man, we cannot consume your take that pizza tonight
Swindler: -sigh- O....k BUT I WILL BE BACK!! TOMORROW!
Lockie and Altug: NO! NO! Make that 6 months!
Swindler: U-M....Make that next week then!
Altug: how about 10 days?
Swindler: O-K...I will be back in 10 days then
Altug to Lockie: He will come back on Monday wouldn't he
Lockie: Yep....
The End!
Well folks that was what happened, it was part-fun, part-Adam Sandler movie. I have to say that the man is persisent and consistent, he knows how to sell those cold, below par pizzas at a high margin. Man...If I ever made a live-action Winnie the Pooh movie, that man will have to play Winnie. But folks with that I must be off, hopefully you all have enjoyed reading this as I have written it. Good day and good night!
Yours Sincerely,
Altug Kayi
If I can recollect...
Well Wednesday night was a good night, it was coming to an end. About 15 minutes before the end of my shift, our friend the Swindler returns. The following is how things went from when he came in...
Scene 1: Work
Characters:
Altug as Altug,
Lockie as Lockie and
Teddy Bear Man as the Swindler in
"The Night the Pizza was no Biddy"
Enter Altug
Altug (to self): Another great night, but gee I am very hungry...
Enter Swindler
Swindler: HOOOOOW RRRRRRRRRRRRRRR YA mate!
Altug (with arms swinging): Oh NO!!!!!! You've returned A-GEIN!!!! I bought a pizza from you on Monday remember!!! ??
Swindler: I'VE GOT SOME BEUTI-FUL PETZAS FOR YA AND LOCKIE
Altug: Well I doubt that we shall want pizza tonight Pizza man, but we shall wait and see, Lockie comes in 15 minutes.
So there was a 15 minute period where two forces were waiting for the arrival of Lockie, the one that will decide upon the fate of the Pizza man's proposal.
Altug: So "Pizza Man" how goes the night?
Swindler: It wos good.....just delivering Petza
The Swindler walks to the magazine section and reads the ever so adulterous and teeny Zoo Magazine
Altug: So Swindler, what are you reading...?
Swindler: .... ....(ignoring all communication)
Altug: Well?
Swindler: .... .... .... ... Good..
Enter Lockie, co-worker
Altug (arms wide open): LOCKIE!!!!!!! YOU'RRRRRRRRRRREE BAAAAAACK! How art thou tonight!? Guess who is back tonight!!? Our good friend the Pizza man!
Lockie: I see
The Swindler goes to his car and brings in 2 cold arse pizzas
Swindler: Lockie! I got a fresh made, nice, nutrious Petzas! I made it just for you, just for you...only $10 each! $10!
Lockie: Ummmm.............errrrr.............Not this time buddy, one is too much for a week.. it isn't healthy
Altug: Hear hear Lockie, Pizza man, we cannot have 2 pizzas in a week! It would be impossible to burn it all off!
Swindler: NAH! Its good for you, it has vitamins! Look at me, I'm healthy...eh eh eh(him laughing pointing at his conspicuous yet cute beer belly)
Altug: uhhhhhh........no...no pizza for me pizza man
Swindler: C'MON LOCKIE! I made it for you! TAKE IT! $15 FOR BOTH!
Lockie: Um....I don't know....
Swindler: TAKE IT!
Lockie: Well no I shouldn't....
Swindler: TAKE IT! TAKE IT!
Altug: Pizza Man we cannot, its too much you little cutie pie
Swindler: C'MON LOCKIE TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE ITTAKE IT
Lockie: Look when I buy it, its cold and it just goes to the bin..
Altug: Pizza man, he's right, it would be a waste to throw it into the bin
Swindler: TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT!! $5 $5 $5! TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT!!!!
Lockie: ah.....no, no more pizza, one is enough a week..
Swindler: C'Mon Lockie! I made it just for you!! Besides I had a pizza tongiht, I can't finish these! TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT
Altug: TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE IT....uh...actually, Pizza man, we cannot consume your take that pizza tonight
Swindler: -sigh- O....k BUT I WILL BE BACK!! TOMORROW!
Lockie and Altug: NO! NO! Make that 6 months!
Swindler: U-M....Make that next week then!
Altug: how about 10 days?
Swindler: O-K...I will be back in 10 days then
Altug to Lockie: He will come back on Monday wouldn't he
Lockie: Yep....
The End!
Well folks that was what happened, it was part-fun, part-Adam Sandler movie. I have to say that the man is persisent and consistent, he knows how to sell those cold, below par pizzas at a high margin. Man...If I ever made a live-action Winnie the Pooh movie, that man will have to play Winnie. But folks with that I must be off, hopefully you all have enjoyed reading this as I have written it. Good day and good night!
Yours Sincerely,
Altug Kayi
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